Questions rule my life!

"The key to wisdom is knowing all the right questions" ~ John A. Simone, Sr.

All my life it seems like questions have been there. My biggest questions seem to start with Why.

"Why did this happen to me?"
"Why can't I ever lose weight?"
"Why am I always broke?"
"Why me?"

I realize that the why questions I was asking seemed to just send me in circles and the answers filled me with helplessness. I felt like I was setting myself up to fail. I decided to change my questions.
A simple change that makes all the difference in the world.

"Why not me?"

Can I double my income this year? "Why not me?"

Can I win an award for achievement? "Why not me?"

Can I reach my goal weight? "Why not me?"

Can I reach my dreams? "Why not me?"


When things go wrong as they sometimes do then my "What" questions kick in.

"What can I learn from this?"
"What should I change?"
"What went right?"
"What am I grateful for?"

These simple changes allow me to empower myself. They allow me to open the door to my own opportunity.

Since I was a little girl, I have always wanted to write a book. I have articles published, short stories published, but have never achieved my dream of getting my book published. I have submitted in a few chapters. Sparked some interest, but I have never followed through because "life got in the way".

I have wanted to lose weight and indeed I have, but then "life got in the way" and I gained some back.
The easiest way to not have to lose weight is to keep it off in the first place!
I know what to do and what not to do to get and keep the weight off, but walking the walk every day is a lot more challenging than letting the daily events determine what and when I eat or exercise.
Dennis' hospital stays meant long days of sitting by his bedside. Quick meals from the cafeteria were the easy way. I came home on the average of 4 hours a night to grab a quick nap and catch up with essentials. Then once he came home, there were so many things that had to be done. Our bedroom moved downstairs, catch up with everything that I had let slide during his hospital stays. My 2 businesses had both lost momentum while I was away. My book was behind schedule. My training incomplete for my new business venture. Life was overwhelming!

Do you have a favorite excuse? Lol I am afraid that mine is "Life just keeps getting in the way."
It isn't just an excuse it is also just plain fact.
My husband has Kidney and liver failure, he has had multiple strokes and stints in his heart as well as COPD and the list goes on.
I have had cancer 4 times, and have a slew of medical conditions of my own. but recently I watched a video that I am going to allow to change my life. It is about a girl who was born with no legs who was taught to never say "Can't".

So now my question is "How Can I?"

Reflecting on my life brings out questions like:

"Who am I?"

"Who could I be?"

I am a woman who is quickly approaching my ___ birthday.

"Dear, how old am I" I asked my husband and my son. One of them is sure to know! Seriously I never keep track and never know what to fill in the blank with. It is not a big thing to me.

I am also swiftly approaching my 27th anniversary which is on Valentine's Day. No, I did not have to ask about that one ;-)

I am a wife, mother, grandmother, sister (though a lot of my family has disowned me), daughter, business owner, coach, speaker, author, insurance agent, storyteller, life long learner... the list goes on and on.

I have owned several businesses over the years including a seed store, a seasonal card store, 3 newspapers, a rabbit farm, chicken farm, a long haul trucking company, as well as being an associate for several business opportunities.

I am a survivor. Having survived abuse as a child and adult, debilitating accidents and health conditions, 4 marriages and their endings, along with many other things including the death of my daughter. I can tell you that there is nothing as devastating as losing your child.

I am also an emotional eater. I put on 100 pounds in the year following my daughter's death and have struggled with the weight loss yo-yo cycle. Lose 20 pounds and gain back 30.  Now I am not asking:

"Why me?" or even "Why can't I ever lose weight and keep it off?"

Instead I am asking "What can I learn?"

I have known for years that I am an emotional eater, but I never really have dealt with that aspect of my weight loss. I found some books on it like Eating with Heart by Laurel Inman. However binge eating is not my problem. I don't binge eat. I just choose not quite so healthy foods that are comfort foods. However the questions I ask can help me learn how to control my weight loss destiny.

Questions like:

Why do I give into emotional eating?  What plan can I come up with to avoid this in the future?

When do I use emotional eating? What can I do instead?

Most often my emotional eating has to do with my family members being ill, hospitalized or me feeling helpless to protect them. Unfortunately this also ties into times when my activity level is at an all time low. I have never felt that exercising in a hospital ward room is a good time.

So what plan can I come up with ...

That question haunted me. Staring at it. Brainstorming only works if you can actually come up with something to write down! ;-)

Suddenly the right question came out of the blue...

What can I do?

Fresh fruit and veggies can be indulged in at hospital bedside without much effort.

Though I must admit - that I never considered that while at the hospital. I generally don't think about food. Then I get over hungry and over eat. Portion size goes out the window and those comfort foods like cheese cake, hot chocolate, and cookies are the ones I reach for. Grabbing a quick meal from a fast food joint coming and going to the hospital adds to the problem.

However next time I will be more prepared. I did some looking for grocery stores near the hospital and found that they were as close as the fast food places are. Plan 1 in place.

Exercise: This one is a little harde. However, I can do squats in the restroom every time I need to go.

What can I do to deal with the helplessness. - Write of course! My book is way behind schedule and it is something I can do as I sit and stew. Now I can go and do!

"Go and Do, don't Sit and Stew!" ~ John Byetheway